:: American Angst :: |
||||||
|
|
 Join the Angst Update List and get email when I update my site Praise? Suggestions? Vitriol? Email Me! |
Puttin' the FUN in dys-FUN-ctional!! It's the holidays! Time for Ding Fries Are Done! |
||||
|
Happy (belated) birthday, George! I luuuuhjoooooo Boo-Boo-Kitty-Fuck! *smoooch*
Oh how I tried to resist bitching about American Idol. I did. But I can hold back no more.
I wonder if Randy Jackson realizes what a TOTAL racist he is? He just falls all over himself to 'represent' to his brethren up there, regardless of how awful they sound, all "EE-uh, ee-uhhh, eee-uhhh! Dude, you da bombfizzityshniggleflitzer wiffsnatch!!"
And yet when a white person sings, and sings just as well, if not better, than the previous black singers, he cannot bring himself to say anything more complimentary than *sucks breath in through his teeth first* "yo, it wuz jess aw-ite fuh me, man" auuuuggghhhh wanna bitch-smack his ass.
And while we're on the subject, would someone PLEASE ask him to quit telling young girls that they "can really blow"?? Soooo not right.
Ohhhh and pleeeease explain to me W.H.Y. they thrust a microphone into the face of the booted contestant each week and force them to sing?! Not only is it mean-spirited, but dude? I helped vote them off for a REASON. The song you have them sing? EXACT reason I didn't VOTE for them! Cut that shit OUT, wouldja?
I would also like to complain that not enough contestants are reading my site here, because last year at this time I was quite clear about the rules in that there would be NO MORE of that waving around of your fingers to inform those of us who can't HEAR or SEE what your particular voting number is while Ryan Seacrest is informing the public of your number so we can vote. Listen up, foo: If you were good, I will vote for you. If you suck...I WON'T. You waving your hand around all stupid-like is SO not going to change my mind. And Aloha? Learn to count, babe. Last week her number was ten, but she flashed her hand, with all fingers splayed, 3 times, which....say it with me...equals FUCKIN' FIFTEEN. You better keep workin' that voice o' yours, honey, because if you can't manage to count to ten without fuckin it up, you can't even ask me if I want FRIES with that shit.
Since we're all clear now that Gracie is premenstrual and needs to vent the venom currently coursing through her veins, let's continue:
Constantine - I know you love yourself, but your slurring ass needs to GO. HOME. You are not, and never will be, Jim Morrison. And stop SCREAMING. You are this season's Nikki McKibbin. Not just because you aren't anything CLOSE to being a good singer, but you have NO idea that that's the case, and that is sad pookie.
Is Paula capable of giving feedback any more substantial than "you're the you that you know you are and that's why you're uniquely you and that's why you'll be you tomorrow."?? WHY is she even there?
OOoohhh and that STUPID amateur singer move where they cannot resist the urge to use their hands to 'sign' the song they're singing...like Scott Sable, who is a fantastic singer, but the line was 'I love you' and, while singing the line, he pointed to his eye while singing "I" and then pointed to his heart while singing "Love", then pointed to the audience when he sang "Yoooou." HURL.
And that kid that always wears a hat? The one who sang first tonight? Did you see the clip they played just before he sang? Here's a portion of it: "...there's a rumor that I'm bald and I'm not. I just hope you'll see that I'm not. I really, really hope so. I do." Uuuuummm, doofus? THEN TAKE OFF THE HAT. It's not like they GLUED it to your head. Dork.
I'm starting a new feature here on the site...at least for this season; it's called "Stupid American Idol Comments Uttered by Judges" and today is the first installment. See if you can figure out the moron that uttered these words:
Who watched the Oscars? Nope, neither did I. But I did watch Oprah's Day After show and I am shocked to find that Barbra Streisand may not be THE dumbest actor on the planet. Tim Robbins certainly gives her a run for her money in that department, but when I saw the clip of Sean Penn pouting over Chris Rock's joke about Jude Law? Not only did I want to poke him in the EYE for being so stupid, but it just explained SOOOO much about him and the rest of Hollystupid.
Dear Amazon.com,
What the hell is the point of 'pre-ordering' a not-yet-released item if you're not going to push it to my shopping cart and/or send it to me once it's released??? 4 days after the item that I PRE-ORDERED (meaning PLACE MY ORDER ASSCLOWN) I log into your site and see that my cart is empty...nothing has shipped since my last order, and yet there is the item...all sitting there ready to 'add to cart' but I have to click on it to do that...just as I would with any other item. So what the HELL does 'pre-order' do, anyway?????
Love,
There's a road sign on the way to my parent's house and it makes me giggle each time I see it. It's so simple, and yet I love it. It has an arrow pointing at the street and says "Stop Here" but that's not what I love about it...no, what I love is that someone slapped a sticker underneath the words 'Stop Here' that says "SHEEP". Heh.
I'd like to know how you become a person who, when someone passes you in the hallway at work and they smile at you and say "Hello" you look directly at them, look away, and keep walking, without even so much as acknowledging that the person spoke to you. So freakin rude. How effing HARD is it to say "HELLO" or to nod...or even just smile at someone who's being nice to you?? Sweets? I don't care HOW much better you think you are than me and everyone else, FUCKING ACKNOWLEDGE A POLITE SENTIMENT, ya freakin' asshole.
Someone Arrived Here Searching For:
ass muncher porn
Last 5 Entries:
How Much Are YOU Worth? - Sunday, Jan. 08, 2006 Perfume and Lazy Bastards.... - Wednesday, Jan. 04, 2006 Like Poop Through a Goose.... - Saturday, Dec. 31, 2005 Bling and Bullets.... - Thursday, Dec. 29, 2005 Get Into The Frickin Spirit.... - Friday, Dec. 23, 2005
Much love to: BlogSkins, Rick (the design), and (of
course) Powered
by Diaryland(TM) | ||||||
